These Are The Kind of Photos You Frame....

Thanks to everyone for patiently sticking out my absence. I'm still getting back into the groove of things but plan on writing a little piece about the 5.5 days I was away from the husband and kids. 


Yes, that's right, I was alone this entire last week. Well, definitely not alone, I was surrounded by friends and family, but I was without the three boys and Nate. So, maybe it goes without saying that even though I have been back for 2 days, I'm still disoriented and shell-shocked from jumping feet first back into the craziness, and kind of thinking what the fuck?

So, I'm pulling a previously written but not yet published post of these pictures I've been wanting to show you of how the boys have embarrassed me or themselves recently. Because that's always fun. They're nice and crappy in quality because they were taken with my cell phone camera, and we all know how amazing those bitches are. 


As a side note, I also took some awesomely funny (at least to the 13-year-old boy inside of me) photos of things on my trip out of state and can't wait to show you those soon.

Heil Hi, Hitler Mom and Dad

This one was taken at Ethan's "singing and dance" performance in his kindergarten class. It's of all the little kindergartners standing around muttering singing their little hearts out in the classroom. Aaaand that's my kid standing there doing the ole "heil Hitler" wave, with the fucked-up hair. Nice. He's been doing this wave since the dawn of his waving days and yes, it's totally embarrassing, because we do not delight a gesture that represents the persecution and murder of millions of innocent people. Adding to the whole picture, he's predominantly German. Nice touch, huh?

I swear, we've never taught him to do that wave, nor do any of our German families (knowingly) descend from Nazis. And yes, I blurred out the faces of his classmates. The phone camera is shitty, but not that shitty.

Up next....

Thank you. No really, thank you.

I took Connor to Safeway one day. If you've ever been to Safeway and purchased something that's too big or cumbersome to place in a bag, they typically put a bright orange "thank you" sticker on the item to prove that you've paid for it and are not stealing it as you stroll out the doors. Well, sometimes, the clerks give some thank you stickers to the boys because they all know how much kids LOVE stickers. This day, the clerk gave Connor some stickers and he placed one of them in the most perfect, perfect, place he possibly could have. 

Yes, Connor, thank you. Clearly, this is a kid who understands symbolism. I enjoyed a nice, quiet ride home. Thank you.

Kid containment
I love Trader Joe's, but I dislike their shopping cart, i.e. kid containment, options. If you have more than one small kid with you, you're screwed. When I was dumb or desperate enough to take all three boys into T.J.'s before Connor (the middle child) was old enough to not dart away, I had to put Brandon in the regular kid spot, Connor in the main basket, let Ethan run amok, and then pile the food and shit on the bottom or around Connor in the basket and hope for the best. It was not an ideal situation.


Recently, the boys came up with this option. It was not ideal, either.

Yes, those are the two older boys stuffing themselves in the bottom part of the cart. And yes, I AM in the booze aisle. 

Naturally.