Thursday, May 3, 2012

Just call me Paranoid.

For a variety of reasons, I try not to spend too much time at my son's school (hanging out with 23 kids.... yeahnothanks). I'm definitely not one of the moms who regularly volunteers in the class or joins the P.T.A. I'm just not that into it. I send my kid to school for us all to get a break from each other - not for me to go hang out with even more kids.

However, because I can't just be normal, I have this really weird thing in which I am extremely uncomfortable with somebody I do not know driving my child anywhere. I have horrible visions of the driver chugging vodka straight from the bottle (because I'd be tempted to chug alcohol while having mad amounts of kids in my presence, too), and turning around to scream at the kids to shut up and then slamming into a semi truck at warp speed, resulting in a fiery death for my son. 


And then I'd have to kill the person who wasn't paying attention and was drunk driving and killed my child. Oh wait, they'd be dead, too. Anyway, because of my paranoia and insanity, school field trips are quite the conundrum for me. I want him to go, but I don't want to go and hang out with all the kids, but I can't let someone else drive him. So I have to go. My desire for my son to live outweighs my dislike of hanging out with tons of kids.

I've managed to be able to drive him on his trips the entire school year.... until this month. He has two trips, and they fall on Nate's work days, and are really early in the morning. Except one, it's a little later and we can make it work for me to drive Ethan. But the other one....

So I thought about it, and I was like, well maybe I can ask someone to just hang with the younger boys for a couple of hours. I don't have a lot of options for that but I do have maybe one or two. 

And then, I took a big step. Here it is, people: I decided to give getting over this fear a chance.

Whoa. I know. You're rolling your eyes and I'm over here shakily patting myself on my back for confronting my fear. Go ahead and mock.


"But why, Elizabeth?" you're not asking.

Well, for one, it's ridiculous. Other people driving my kids is just the reality. It's going to happen. Also, I feel more comfortable confronting it because I've kind of gotten to know a handful of the other parents. This makes me feel better because I haven't picked up anything too alarming about any of them. (Although I'm sure they won't say the same about me. Fine.) 


I've also watched them (like a hawk) driving around the school. So far, with the exception of some total dipshit who was in front of me the other day (and was not a parent from Ethan's class), I haven't noticed any awful driving habits. But, how hard is it to circle a parking lot? Actually, for that dipshit, really, really hard. But everyone else seems to manage it properly.


Plus, I have to assume that the parents want to keep their own children as safe as possible and will actually drive accordingly.

Also, Ethan had a play date (I really hate that word, but what else can I call it?) a couple of weeks ago, and the parents picked him up from school and drove him to their house. This was a big deal for me because not only did someone I don't really know drive him, like, an entire mile to their house, he also went by himself there. As in, I didn't know them and I wasn't there to make sure they didn't do dirty, bad things to him or make stupid decisions that allowed a stranger to do dirty, bad things to him, like let the kids walk to the pedophile neighbor's house by themselves or something. 


And frankly, because most of the other kids in the class had already had play dates with this particular kid and nothing hairy seemed to happen to anyone, I was significantly more comfortable. 

So I'm going to do my best to break out of this particular form of craziness. Am I the only one who has weird issues with strangers (or hell, I'll be honest, even people I DO know) driving their kids?


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14 comments:

  1. I have always, always, ALWAYS had issues with this one. I'm better about it, but really, I still struggle with it...

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    1. I knew I could count on you to be right there with me on this one!! I suspect that I'm always going to be uncomfortable with it, too. It was something that (very unexpectedly) cropped up in me RIGHT AWAY, almost like some instinctual fear or something. Meaning, nothing actually caused it; it's been inherent in me. Ugh.

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  2. And this, in a nutshell, is why I homeschool. Who's got issues now?

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    1. Ha, C! I have to admit, when Ethan started school, and I saw the great abyss that we were falling into with all the new potential bad (or even just annoying) things that could happen, I seriously considered, "Would it really be so hard to homeschool?" And then the boys would just drive me nuts and I'd be like, nope, not strong enough to do it. I'm not that good of a mom; I just can't be around my kids all the time like that. Plus, I'm too scared to be entirely responsible for their education!
      It's been a huge balancing act; the lesser evils, the rocks and hard places.... :)

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  3. Well, let’s be real. You are a LITTLE weird. But that’s what we love about you.

    I’m also completely paranoid. We have a teenager (my stepdaughter) who I flipped out on for getting a ride home (I didn’t want to bother you, you are(were) 9 months pregnant and kind of a crabass) with the parent of a kid I haven’t met, nor have I met the mom.

    Now, I’m sure that this kid’s mom isn’t going to take her to strip clubs, nor is she going to be feeding her cocktails on the 2 minute drive to my house.

    But still.
    I don’t *know* her.

    My baby son, however – gets toted around by his babysitter several times a day. And I don’t blink an eye.

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    1. Hee hee I LOVE being a "little" weird! And that you all love that about me!

      I'm so glad that I am not the only one who feels this way. I've mentioned it before to people and have gotten some strange looks so I was kind of thinking I was alone. But through comments on Facebook and here, I see that I am NOT! I can certainly understand why you flipped out on your teen. And why you don't blink an eye about the babysitter toting around your son; that's someone you are supposed to trust with your babe!

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  4. i have a 1-y-o son, so i haven't thought about this stuff, and i didn't have any issues with that stuff. i might now. ;)

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    1. Awww, I didn't want to project my craziness onto anyone! Hopefully this one will just pass you by... :-)

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    2. some day i'll email you asking for the name of the "i take a pill for that" pill. jk, but you have valid concerns. when your kids are driving themselves, then worry. for now it's all good. :-)

      ps - you can't project crazy onto crazy; it's like "i'm rubber and you're, well, rubber. dammit. who's the glue? oh, our husbands. suckas. haha."

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    3. I can't even think about the boys driving themselves... *shudder*

      And you're right about the crazy, thanks!

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  5. I think every normal Mom has this issue. But I agree you need to let go at some point. I am saying this even after experiencing another Mom who reaked of alcohol on a field trip! Yep, she was a driver and even had a preschool teacher as a passenger! I was like wtf?? So sometimes being paranoid is completely justified.

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    1. Holy cripes, that's awful... AWFUL.

      Yep, I find it odd when people I've talked to about random things that I'm a little freaked out about try to pooh-pooh it, like it's impossible and I'm crazy for thinking it could happen. I'm like, um, it's happened before to other people, I'm not pulling this out of my ass!!

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  6. My son isn't even a yr old yet and we've had similar discussions. car rides, play dates, sleep overs, babysitters. we also have a lot of issues. thanx for post.. ppl we know look at us like we've nuts, u made me feel more sane

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    1. You're welcome, although I don't know that you should use me as your marker for sanity... hahaha! No, actually, as you probably saw from the other comments, (and I got some similar comments on Facebook) many other parents feel the same way. So you are definitely not alone!

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